April 2009
48 posts
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Beatlejuice - Blackbird (remix)
Rob da Bank...
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There used to be a time when I would write...
Jacko: What's this band called again?
Me: Umm... (tries to remember) It's three short words... and I think one of them is 'red'.
Jacko: Red Red Wine?
Me: Yeah, like UB40! If that's not their name then it should be. I'll just call them that from now on anyways.
Me: How old do you think that Rory guy from the band is?
Jacko: About 30 probably.
Me: I think I fancy him a bit.
Me: This song would be better with steel drums.
Jacko: The guitarist is pretty good.
Me: Is he? I reckon I could do that if someone told me how.
Jacko: Nah, he's nice and restrained. I think they're like a country U2.
Me: Yeah, they have that rooftop gig quality about them, don't they? Have you ever seen the Blaze of Glory video by Bon Jovi?
Jacko: Yeah! Yeah I have actually.
Me: I wish I could give that guy his very own clifftop, except he's too bald to really take advantage of it.
Jacko: Maybe they're reminding me of that Coldplay EP, The Blue Room.
Me: Nah, they're more like Free. Not like All Right Now though, more like one of the album tracks...
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my top five favourite people featured in werner...
Number 5 - The dude from Cambridge who only wears tweed and wool in tribute to Scott and Shackleton. He moniters volcanic activity on Antarctica, and every time someone said “volcanology” or “volcanologist” I couldn’t stop thinking of a winged Brian Blessed swooping down into the steam shouting “Gordon’s alive?!”
Number 4 - The woman who...
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“Those who write on Heaven’s walls/ Should mold their shit in little balls/...”
– Kurt Vonnegut (perpetually profound)
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DJ Schmolli vs. the Johnny Cash & His All-Star...
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Down The Tiny Steps - Haggis Blues
So, a few...
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Things I found during today's mammoth cleaning...
1- My iPod (hooray!)
2- A flyer for an Alabama 3 afterparty on which I have written: “Episode where father of suicide kid tries to kill him, but is not strong enough. Pride dented - he’s a crumpled man - believed in his son’s genius. He thinks that fiancé’s father had sent someone to do it, but that’s guilt talking.” I have no idea what this means but...
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Gomez - Win Park Slope
Absolutely the best thing...
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Link: How JG Ballard influenced rock'n'roll (from... →
I reckon this may well be another of those Vonnegut/Updike situations, where I only discover an author once he’s snuffed it.
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Totally Gormleys
Just so you know, all these photos look totally fucked up because I posted this and then redesigned the blog (read: stole a pre-coded theme from Tumblr) and now I can’t be arsed going back and changing every photo in like, every blog ever. Soz.
I was all tucked up in bed last night when Andy shouted up the stairs to say he was going to Kristine’s, so I got out of bed and got...
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WTF JONNIE COMMON
So, it the Fence Homegame festival this weekend, and I just wrote a big long thing about how I’ve never been but I’ve seen loads of Fence Collective artists play because Dunk puts on amazing gigs as Red Deer Club and King Creosote came down to the Hedge birthday party and Down The Tiny Steps are like, MY FAVOURITE BAND IN THE WORLD EVER and number three on my Last FM chart and how I...
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The ultimate Hugh
I wish I could create my perfect Hugh.
I’d take the voice and music taste of Huw Stephens,
the beard, body and bank balance of Hugh Jackman,
and the ethical butchery skills of Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall.
Anyone know anything good about that Huw dude that reads the news?
It’s thoughts like these that make me wish I understood Photoshop. *Sigh*
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Chin up, petal!
I read my horoscope on the bus this morning, and it said about not jumping to conclusions because the answer I’m looking for won’t arrive until the end of the day, at which point I snorted right into the Metro’s crappy ‘lifestyle’ pages and thought to myself “That’ll be Student Finance Direct announcing they’ve set fire to all my appeal documents then” which is a pretty good impression of someone...
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WatchI’ve just discovered Artbabble.org, which is like YouTube for cardigan-wearers, and I love it.
There’s a whole series of films about artists collaborating with the librarians at the New York Public Library (which looks just like that library in Indiana Jones by the way - was it filmed there?) and then I watched a woman who has hand-dyed individual shapes to create this massive floor...
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“If we, citizens, do not support our artists, then we sacrifice our imagination...”
– Yann Martel, author.
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Last time I spent over £25 on a theatre ticket it...
It’s in an abandoned building in the centre of Manchester, and the audience are only admitted in groups of 9, every ten minutes. We have to wear sensible shoes, and we should think twice if we have ‘a nervous disposition’. Damon Albarn wrote a lot of the score. That’s pretty much all I know about Felt Like A Kiss, other than Manchester International Festival have...
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Some stuff about The Boat That Rocked, with added...
Firstly, some bad things about The Boat That Rocked:
They sit atop a sinking ship smoking cigarettes that, even if they had have had lighters, let’s be honest, the fags would not have made it through the underwater rescue missions.
All the rescue boats arrive at once with pre-prepared banners.
There is a Duffy song on the soundtrack and her album gets prime placement in the finishing montage.
...
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When Wolfmother announced they would be disbanding...
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Now that I've written this, the last part of The...
You know how, after a certain number of years, you can go to some official place somewhere and request your FBI file? And like, the Freedom Of Information Act means you can just go and ask what the Prime Minister has for breakfast and they’re obliged to tell you? I wish they’d do that for the Booker Prize.
I’m reading The White Tiger at the moment, by Aravind Adiga, which...
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How I came to join the the alternative prog-blues...
Man, isn’t Twitter just amazing?
I posted about a dream I had where the salmon farming company that my folks used to work for merged with Channel 4 (most boring dream ever) and then all of a sudden Marine Harvest Canada are like, my new best friends.
Then I said something about knitting and instantly got loads of people recommending summer-friendly yarns.
Then I got one random golfing...
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This is my friend Kristine with a penguin head
So, I’m staying at my friend Kristine’s house all this week, making sure armies of feral South Manchester kids don’t put fireworks through her letterbox, and occassionally cleaning out the cat’s litter tray and stuff. Her and Paul (the boyfriend) have bought Dairy Milk ice creams and made me a Mii character on the Wii Fit, although those two things aren’t exactly...
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“Fuck the casual viewer. Seriously, who wants a casual viewer? If you’re a...”
– David Simon, creator of The Wire
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Bursting their Bubble (the worst title for a blog...
I’ve been trying to formulate an opinion on Bubble Theatre’s new ‘fan-made’ project, but I’m struggling to rubber stamp my thoughts with my usual foolhardy levels of brazen confidence. I’m just… not sure.
To give you some background, the Bubble Theatre Company in London have reacted to recession levels of arts funding by offering the public a £20 stake...
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“Ruskin is, as you already know, a very cute and fuzzy creature. She’s...”
– An excerpt from Kristine’s instructions for looking after her cat
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Like a Woolf in sheep's clothing
I went to see the old gits in Macclesfield this afternoon, and ended up getting on a train that didn’t even stop in Macc. Had to go all the way to Stoke and back again, and as soon as I realised I was all like “oh no, everyone I speak to at Stoke station is going to call me ‘duckie’, and then they’ll say something about a bus but it’ll come out like...
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“My Shoes Are In Love
Although I’ve never seen them kiss.
But whenever I...”
– By Ross Sutherland (my future husband, along with Mike Phillips from the Welsh rugby team and Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall)
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Jonathon Jones: "I love wind farms"
There were a couple of articles of note on the Guardian’s culture pages today. The first was about the dearth of young theatre reviewers in this country, but it quickly went onto to explain that in order to be any kind of competent critic, one must have clocked up 10,000 hours of watching plays, and not just the cheap stuff either. QED. It is quite depressing though, to be fair. Almost...
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Don't Think Twice, It's all so unfair and all men...
So, how does this new grey and red affair look then? I did have all the posts scrunched up on the right hand side, and then I decided I wanted to put a picture where the Hallowed Lords Of HTML decreed there shalt be no picture, and then I found a site that said it matched colours for you and I turned the whole thing dog-sick yellow. So now its grey. For the time being at least.
I wanted to...
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